4 DAYS, 21 HOURS, 35 MINUTES, 31 SECONDS

The amount of time before I'm officially a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints.

Wow. This is REAL.

I've been waiting around thinking this would never come, like a total drama queen, and now IT'S HERE. It completely snuck up on me without me even noticing. 

My farewell is on Sunday. Topic: Becoming a Disciple of Christ. I have so many family members and friends traveling from far and near to come support me and I feel SO blessed and loved.

Preparing for this mission has been quite a bit harder than I thought it would be, and I'm so grateful for the amazing help my mom, dad and ward family have been to me. 

My mom. What a woman. Seriously, I don't know anyone else like her. What did I do to deserve her in my life? I think that is going to be the number one hardest thing about leaving for 18 months. Not having her near, and not being able to just call her up anytime I want. I've come to a realization that having my mom is truly a privilege. We should never take our loved ones for granted... they won't be with us forever, and we should cherish every moment we spend with them.

I've been given several teaching opportunities by my ward in the past few weeks and I'm really grateful for the experiences. It's put into perspective how far I have come as a teacher... and how far I still need to go. It gave me a little taste of what I'll be doing for the next 18 months. 

4 days. 21 hours. 35 minutes. 31seconds. Then I will be set apart as a representative of Jesus Christ. 

Hermana Franklin.

Can I really do this?

The Crane and the Lillies

Okay everyone. I’m really struggling here.

Before I explain, I’d like everyone to remember that this is a judge free zone. Good? K, thanks. Haha…

This is the issue… I can’t decide how I feel about the ending of Prison Break.(HEY, remember? No judging...)

(I should mention…. SPOILER ALERT.)

Seeing as I’ve been spending a lot more time alone than I’m used to, I’ve developed a minor addiction to Netflix. Maybe major. Haha… Sooooo productive, I know.

Let me begin by saying that I missed the Prison Break Bandwagon by a long shot all those years ago when it was popular. (Just like I did with LOST, 24 and Friday Night Lights). So I decided to spend my dear, sweet time seeing what I missed out on… And I will say this…

It WAS addicting. I could watch 4 episodes in a row and still eagerly start the 5^th. (Then I would realize I spent more than 3 hours sitting in the same spot staring, unblinking at a TV screen. And then I’d just feel ashamed of myself. Haha.)

Why was it so addicting? Well, Like any addicting TV show, the plot was constantly thickening, always moving and ALWAYS intense.

The whole sha-bang, really. Rescues, revenge, betrayal, alliances, twists, turns and romance.

I think I hit my psychotic break last night when I had to remind myself SEVERAL times that these characters are, in fact FICTIONAL.

Seeing these people run for their lives for four seasons made me attatched to them in a way that is almost…. well, not almost… IS embarrassing.

I loved Michael Scofield.

He was brilliant, mysterious and clearly cared more about his family than anything.

I rooted for Lincoln Burrows.

He was innocent, and I hated the world for believing otherwise. He was a big tough guy who just wanted to be with his son and brother.

I admired Sara Tancredi.

She was smart, and made it possible for the brothers to be together. And even though she had been through a lot, she didn’t play the “victim”, she was tough. Tough women rock.

I ADORED Fernando Sucre.

He always came through, I never questioned his motives, and he was the best “best friend” anyone could ask for.

I despised Theodore Bagwell.

Scum like him is the reason we have prisons. Ugh… I can’t stand that guy.

I had a hate/ love relationship with most all of the other characters… as I hated them in the beginning but grew to love them at the end, or vice versa.

The point is… I had a very serious relationship with ALL of them. Haha…

RIDICULOUS. IT’S A STUPID, COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC T.V. SHOW THAT AIRED 7 YEARS AGO. FRICK. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?

*Sigh*…..Okay, Let me just get this out.

WHY IS HE DEAD?

WHY did Michael have to die??

The man who saved everyone.

The man who made everyone free.

The guy who allowed them all to have their family safe, and then never be with his own.

The guy who put dangerous terrorists behind bars forever.

The father of a baby boy yet to be born!  

THE man who never gets to experience the joy of HIS triumph over evil.

WHAT THE HECK IS THAT ABOUT?

I’m just sort of, well… MAD. I’ll admit I even shed a tear or two. (Or a thousand...)

But, I guess should have known the tumor would come back. And that it might eventually kill him.

I should have known a character like that would eventually sacrifice their life… It’s all “in his nature”. Plus, the whole thing builds up to a dramatic ending like that.

He was in one heck of a lose/lose situation.
I should have seen it coming. I really should have. And I actually think I did.

I knew they wouldn’t all survive in the end. When Sarah “came back from the dead” I think it confirmed to my subconscious that Michael was eventually going to have to give her up FOR REAL.

But I didn’t let myself believe it. I really, really wanted a PERFECT happy ending. Where Sarah and Michael go to Costa Rica together and raise their perfect Son together.

Instead Michael dies in the jail where they abused his defenseless wife.

WHAT?

Sure, The Company was brought down. Sure, SYLLA is in the hands of someone trust worthy. Sure, many bad people were brought to justice.

But what about Brad, and Danny, and Veronica, all the people that T-Bag killed along the way… and yes, what about Michael?

Was it all worth it? Would Michael have done all that he did, if he knew that he was just going to give his life in the end?

Well, I don’t know. But something tells me… Yes.

Yes, he would have. I think Lincoln Burrows and Michael Scofield understand more about sacrifice than the average person. Lincoln sacrificed a lot of his life so that Michael could have a good one. A life with an education and a job, a productive place in society. Michael gave up his job, his money, and eventually his life for Lincoln, Sarah and his little son.

I guess that’s what it’s all about… Brotherhood and sacrifice… Putting the needs of others before your own.

I guess that’s what we call true love.  Way to go Michael.

Alright. I suppose I’m at peace with this tragedy .

“And they lived happily ever after.”

(And again, let me remind myself that Michael Scofield isn’t real. Haha.

BUT I think our world really could use a few more “Michael Scofields”.)

Looking Back

Well folks....

Here's to writing the date wrong on all my checks!

This last year has been a good, memorable year. A lot of significant things happened...Here's just a few...

• The New York Giants won the Superbowl 
• Queen Elizabeth marked her 60th year of reign as Britain's monarch
• The Artist wins Picture of the Year at the Academy Awards
• The Summer Olympics were held in Great Britain this year
• The century's second, and last solar transit of Venus occurred (the next is predicted to occur in 2117)
• Hurricane Sandy killed hundreds of people and caused considerable damage in the Caribbean, US, and Canada
• Obama was re-elected as president of the United States
• A series of terrorist attacks are directed against United States diplomatic missions worldwide
• The age for LDS missionaries was lowered from 19 to 18 for boys and from 21 to 19 for girls

But when I look back on the last year, some of the most significant things that happened were never on the news and will never be anywhere to be found in a history book...

I met so many friends who mean the world to me. 

I think if I've learned anything about friendship, it's to hang in, stay connected, fight for them, and let them fight for you. Don't walk away, don't be distracted, don't be too busy or tired, DON'T take them for granted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. Powerful stuff.

Thank you.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

Thank you for encouraging me.

Thank you for laughing with me.

Thank you for crying with me.

Thank you for teaching me.

Thank you for being patient with me.

Thank you for reading with me.

Thank you for being adventurous with me.

Thank you for being a part of my life.

Thank you for 2012.

The Spirit of the Season

The best time of year.

A time of giving, tradition, friendship, family and laughter.

There is glittery snow on the ground and ice cycles hanging from the roof.

I love having everyone together. The house smells like cinnamon, apples and bread baking in the oven.

The table is set for 12. 

This will be my last Christmas with my Family before I head out to New York. I'm just taking in every minute, and feeling grateful to have such a wonderful family. 

I can't imagine Christmas without them. I know it will be very different. Still good, but different.

That brings me to think about people who don't have their family close at Christmas. Or a warm house, or Christmas dinner. I pray that they can feel the love of God. I hope they know that the baby Jesus was born in Bethlehem for them. Born for all of us. He lived a perfect life that we might also live, and with his help, also become perfect. I wish I could open my door to anyone who needed a family on Christmas, because it breaks my heart to think someone is alone today.

The spirit of this season is truly a special one. I wish EVERYDAY could be like Christmas.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Sleeping

We're all disgusting when we sleep. EVERYONE. 

Yes. Even you.

Maybe to a lesser degree than someone else... but you are none the less.

Honestly... have you ever looked at your old pillow without a pillow case?

It looks like a bandage from The Civil War. 

Apparently we humans just start seeping syrup and leaking battery acid as soon as we doze off.

Some people sleep with their mouth wide open. We all know how attractive that is.

Others sleep with their eyes half open. 

We all know how freaky that looks. 

People who do both? WOW. Well... that's just one big college-roommate-black-mail-video waiting to happen.

St. Bernard Sleepers and their drool, anyone?

 Don't even get me started on snoring...

Disgusting.

Let's just all agree that "Beauty Sleep" is the worlds greatest oxymoron.

Llamados A Servir

Hoorah for Israel!

Last Saturday Brooklyn, Shelby and I got make history. 

Sister missionaries-to-be gathered at the Provo, Salt Lake City, Honolulu, Logan, and Rexburg temples to celebrate the BOOM of missionaries stepping up to serve. It was truly amazing.

(I'm the one with the 'I HEART NY' sign in front of the Rexburg temple.)

The Three Amigos

Or... Should I say Las Tres Hermanas?

Two of my best friends/roommates are headed to the MTC the SAME DAY, February 20th. 

HOW did this happen? Who knows. But I think it must be God's favorite day.

Shelby: Ohio, Cleveland...English speaking

Tara: New York, New York... Spanish speaking

Brooklyn: Portugal, Lisbon... Portugese speaking

Dear Sister Franklin

His Truth I Will Proclaim

The last 16 days have truly changed my life forever.
I'd say it's a story worth telling.

Waiting for my mission call to come was a very long and lonely process. I felt like I had been forgotten. (Impatient? Yes.) But that was a very real concern.

Why did everyone else get theirs, and not me?

The answer to this question came in a rather unexpected way.

The day after I was on the brink of just giving up, Shelby asked me if I wanted to come to Utah and be there for her mission call opening. How could I go? How could I possibly hide that I was feeling sorry for myself? This was HER special day. And I didn't want to ruin that for her. After getting no sleep the night before I decided to use exhaustion as an excuse not to go. But when it came time to tell her I wouldn't be going... I couldn't. I literally felt like someone was shoving me toward the door. Something was telling me, "You NEED to go." So I did.
When we arrived in Salt Lake City we went to Temple Square. A friend of ours gave us tickets to Savior of the World. I'd seen it several times before, so I wasn't expecting it to be all that different from past experiences.
But I was wrong.
Much of the second half of the performance is dedicated to the story of Thomas, and the doubts he had when the Savior returned as a resurrected being. As Thomas recognized his redeemer and friend, he fell down at Jesus' feet and cried. In that moment, I was Thomas. I knew that I needed to take this sorrow, worry, frustration, confusion and doubt from my heart and lay it at the feet of the Savior. He would take it from me. He was the only one with the power to do so.
"But how? How will I do this Lord? Help me to Believe without seeing."
The next day I went to Shelby's ward. All the lessons I learned were beautiful and profound. And I couldn't help but feel excitement about the gospel. 
I hadn't felt this hopeful in quite some time.It was good to remember.
I felt something that day that I can't really explain. I felt... Love. Love that was pouring over me from all directions. I didn't know why, at the time...I only knew that Heaven was not so far away after all. 
And that I was not forgotten.
When we came home from church we began preparing for people to come watch Shelby open her call. Before, I had been afraid to come because I was fearful that wouldn't be able to be happy for my best friend on such a special day. But that was hardly a concern now. ALL I could feel was happiness. I just knew that all was well.
All was well.
About 10 minutes before Shelby opened her call I checked my phone and found that I had missed a call. I listened to the voice mail. It was my dad's voice telling me that my mission assignment had been made and that it was on it's way in the mail.

What a miracle. That was the answer I spoke of earlier. 
This was not really about a mission call anymore. This was about the choice to believe. 
This was about having faith, hope, and charity. This was about affirming my testimony. 
I know God lives. 
He is there always and forever. I have hope because Christ has overcome the world. He lived on earth, he lives now, and he will come again to reign over his people. 
He paid the price of sin when he suffered in the garden and hung on the cross. 
He loves each and everyone of us individually and perfectly. He loves us perfectly because He knows and understands WHO WE ARE. 
I know that if I were the only person on earth who needed the atonement He still would have done it all for me alone. 
I have faith in His everlasting love and mercy, and I will trust in him.

With tears in my eyes I listened to Shelby read allowed her assignment of service to the Lord. She is going to Cleveland, Ohio to preach the gospel for the next year and half. And what an amazing missionary she is going to be. She is an angel.

By definition an Angel is a class of spiritual beings; a celestial attendant of God, represented with wings, usually clothed in white robes.
Who knows, maybe they do have wings and white robes in heaven. 
However, I know lots of angels without wings or white robes.
Words can't really express how thankful I am for all the angels who come in and out of my life, those who are beyond this world and th

ose of you who walk around like ordinary people here on earth. To me, you are far from ordinary.
All I know is that I've always had someone, tangible/visible or not, to help me fight my battles and protect those I love.
I've had several reminders in the last week that life is short. Really short. Too short to go a day with out expressing gratitude and love. So thank you, to all my angels out there.

I know many of you were with me, praying, fasting, and thinking of me that day. And words can't say how much it meant to me.

 

"Be a living, breathing example of the Highest Truth that resides within you."

Neale Walsch

After such a wonderful weekend spent celebrating Shelby and her decision to serve. I got to spend a beautiful five days with my family for thanksgiving. We went to my aunt Jane's home in Pagosa Springs, Colorado. Such a beautiful place, I'm overjoyed every time we get to visit her. It was great to spend time with all four of us together for the holiday, that doesn't always happen. 

Thanksgiving gave me a good opportunity to reflect on all that had happened and be truly thankful for that many blessings I have.

I live a good life, and I hope I never forget it. 

When I arrived back in Rexburg, my mission call was waiting for me. 

This was it. The moment I'd been prayer for, for what seemed like a long time.

I walked up to my empty apartment (everyone else was in class), mission call in hand, along with another letter that had just come from Tanner Christensen, who was in the MTC at the time. I had always wanted to open my call by myself in a secluded area where I could react exactly as I wanted. This was the perfect opportunity. 

I decided to read Tanner's letter first. Good thing I did. He encouraged me to read a couple scriptures in preparation to open my call. They were EXACTLY what I needed to read. He wrote me his testimony in Spanish. It was so powerful and my heart beat a little stronger and faster as I read it. I had a feeling Spanish was going to be a big part of my life for the next little while. I felt God's arms of love around me as I knelt in prayer to thank Him for the people in my life who had helped me get to this point. I felt so much gratitude for this opportunity I had been given.

My hands were shaking. As I gently tore open the envelope, I was hardly breathing.

I slowly pulled out the letter signed by the prophet, everything felt surreal.

"Dear Sister Franklin,

You are hereby called to serve as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

You have been assigned to labor in the New York, New York South mission. 

It is anticipated you will serve for a period of eighteen months. 

You will report to the Provo Missionary Training Center on February 20th, 2013. 

You will prepare to preach the gospel in the Spanish language."

Joy. True joy.

I didn't know what it felt like until that moment. I am ready to serve my brothers and sisters in New York. Every minute of waiting was worth it.

God knows each of us. He really does. He knows our needs, and he is no stranger to our sufferings. He sent his perfect son to be our Savior, to suffer and die for us. 

"At the throne I intercede;

For thee ever do I plead.

I have loved thee as thy friend,

With a love that cannot end.

Be obedient, I implore,

Prayerful, watchful evermore,

And be constant unto me,

That thy Savior I may be

That thy Savior I may be."